I have been excavating blind spots for 20 years… the texture of them inside of me, the fuzziness, the reaction to defend, something, before you even know what it is. While I have been excavating them in myself, I have also been curious about the blindspots others don’t want to acknowledge or see in themselves. I can’t help but spark a light on them. And as a result, I often see what others can’t see, don’t want to see and need to see.
Blinspots are like fingerprints on a window, where they are only visible when the light is at just the right angle. A glimpse of the shadow of something that was feared, uncomfortable, or incongruent that stuck somewhere, and is visible only sometimes.
Blindspots reveal the parts of us we have excluded or learned to exclude. They are the debris of polarity. Good or bad. Right or wrong. Dark or light. Worthy or unworthy. Powerful or Weak. Love or Fear. Self-love or Guilt.
When you are in integrity you are curious about your blindspots, when you are outside of integrity you are controlled by your blindspots through stubbornness, reactivity, learned ignorance and blame.
Have you ever tried to use your brain, write or work while someone is using a leaf blower outside your window. If you are feeling joyful and hopeful and in flow with the universe, you may be able to laugh it off. If you have any agitation lying inside of you, it will slowly or immediately reveal something, possibly your anger or fear or helplessness.
People’s blindspots are like wind blowers to other people who do not have the same blindspots, a constant irritation that is nearly impossible to avoid and if you try and address it they stick their ears closer to the leaf blower, unite with it, and deem you unhinged or reactive.
This is what white people do with racism. People of color do with internalized white supremacy. Straight people do with homophobia. Gay people do with internalized heteronormativity. Men with women and women with men. And gender conforming people do with non-gender conforming people. Did I loose you? Piss you off? Are you defending yourself? Or are you arguing you are beyond such polarities? We all have blindspots. And they are running into the others constantly, causing small hurts or aggravations we are as blind to as the blindspot in a car rearview mirror.
We live in a world and a cultural soup that is influenced by how we were steeped in polarities. We have to be endlessly curious and dedicated to consciously, pay attention to the nuances of our actions, interactions, feelings and emotions to bring to our awareness the blindspots that have been soaked into our skin, muscles, organs and bones.
In this endless curiosity, presence with, is where freedom from isms lies. Yep, I said it isms.
Blindspots are more than isms. They are also the parts of us we have learned not to accept or that we deny. And,these blindspots cause us to not accept and to deny parts in others. They are the fragments causing disconnection and allowing for micoagressions.